Snapshots Of Gratitude- Cake Edition

Cake

Cake2

Cake

It’d be great if the best things just got better, and the hardest things got easier, and life moved in a clean, linear fashion.

That’s a daydream, so I’m learning to let go, and accept that I can’t control much of anything at all.

What I can do is dive into moments that fill my heart to bursting, allow joy to flow, and gasp from the awareness of being fully human.

A full human.

A menu of emotions.

The utmost potential.

I am grateful for this one, utterly full life.

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On Saturdays, We Linger

Garlic and onion, potatoes and bacon, the scents swirl through the house to reach me in the den, where I write.

I’m on my second cup of coffee, sweetened and creamed. Cinnamon floats atop foam.

Though we’ve payed bills and made plans, we’ve not showered or given a damn.

How sweet it is, to share space and love, with an agenda slow as molasses.

On Saturdays, we linger.

savor slow moments

March Prompts Write ALM

The Unbroken – A Poem for Endometriosis Awareness

This one’s for The Resilient
The women whose bodies
Endure such pain
And such loss

WE are The Unbroken

Endometriosis Awareness

This frog inspires me from its perch in the office where I do pelvic floor physical therapy, which helps me fight back against Endometriosis.

March is Endometriosis Awareness Month. Endometriosis affects 176 million women around the world. The most common symptom of Endometriosis is pelvic pain. Please raise awareness by learning more about Endometriosis, and spreading the word. Thanks!


Endometriosis from Endometriosis.org on Vimeo.
 

March Prompts Write ALM

Snapshots Of Gratitude – The Discomfort of Joy

My guys gave me a birdbath on my birthday. We immediately set it under the apple tree, and I’ve watched it all week for activity. Wake up, go to the window, look for birds. Make coffee, look for birds. Do dishes, look for birds. Look for birds, look for birds, look for birds!

This morning as I loaded the dishwasher, I heard the cry of a Blue Jay. I ran to the window, and behold! A beauty on my birdbath!

Rather than bask in the moment, I grabbed my phone and zoomed in for a picture. I wanted to document the first bird spa visitor. And… I was honestly worried I wouldn’t get this chance again.

There’s a current of scarcity running through life. The good things are wonderful, but the bad things are darn-right devastating. And it doesn’t help that our brains are better at recalling the bad!

It’s difficult to allow the full range of human emotions, and a challenge to accept the uncertainty of it all! Sometimes, it’s excruciating to sit in goodness. We know why pain feels awful, but why is it uncomfortable to feel joy?

Joy is vulnerable

When we have experienced loss, as we all have, the happy stuff can feel precarious. We try to protect our hearts. We imagine if we don’t fully let the joy in, we might somehow safeguard ourselves against the inevitable loss of it. We mitigate our happiness in order to feel… happy. Hmm.

It doesn’t work. We can’t protect ourselves from pain by tempering happiness. What we must do is find the courage to sit in the discomfort of joy. One way we can do that is by practicing gratitude.

Allowing ourselves to drink in moments of piercing beauty, accompanying them with an expression of thankfulness, is bold in the face of scarcity. We are saying YES! to the full human experience.

I’m using the example of the birdbath today, but I have a deeper struggle going on, involving the loss of some relationships, and the deepening of others. We all have areas where we’re resisting painful feelings. We long for comfort and certainty. We need safety and security, love, compassion, and care.

There’s no way to open our hearts to goodness while protecting them from pain. We simply can’t. What we can do is actively move through even the most vulnerable feelings with helpful practices like gratitude and self-compassion.

The next time I feel a bubble of glee drop over my being, I’m going to let it soak me. With open eyes, and a hand on my heart, I’ll lean into joy mixed with fear. I’ll respond- I’m grateful. 

Soften Into Joy

Resource- Brené and Oprah discuss the vulnerability of joy here.

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