So Angie Writes – Life's A Challenge, So Angie Writes!

So Angie Writes – Life's A Challenge, So Angie Writes!

Trauma Recovery – Shame Resilience – Self-Compassion – Coping With Chronic Pain

The (10 second) Practice of Dropping Judgement

June 4, 2015 | 3 Comments

For just a moment, drop judgement. Allow “I should be” and “I shouldn’t be” to fall from your shoulders. Don’t worry. Gravity will hold you. You will not float away!

What’s left, beneath the ruminating, is you- in realtime. Maybe you’re hurting. Dropping judgement won’t take away pain, but it will remove a piece of the struggle. It will move you from the invalidating space of “I shouldn’t be in pain. I should be able to move around freely,” to a validating space of “I am in pain. I hurt.”

The pain is still there. It is real. Unhooking it from judgement just gives you a little space to heal. With that tiny opening, you may even throw in some self-compassion- “I am in pain. I hurt. This is really hard.”

Dropping judgement is WORK. I can only access the sort of thinking I explain above for ten seconds at a time. That’s how deep the perception of lack runs. That’s how strong the draw of perfectionism is. My hustle calls me. I feel anxiety slip back in. “Fix, fix, fix. Fix up your life.”

Mindfulness isn’t a level of existence. It is not a state to arrive at and settle in. Mindfulness is a practice. In the mere seconds we can bear being present, there our healing lies. Let’s tap in as often as we can.

The (10 second) Practice of Dropping Judgement -

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3 people are talking about “The (10 second) Practice of Dropping Judgement

  1. Wow. Slap me up the side of the head – this one hits hard. But, if I can accept that a few seconds of dropping judgment is a start, I can do that. Thanks for the reminder and for letting me know that I am not alone in this struggle. Love you so much!

    • Angie

      It’s hard, hard work. I wouldn’t write about it if I didn’t believe in it. The years of invalidating ourselves, letting shame beat us down, none of it has decreased my pain. In fact, it increased my pain. Having physical pain, a chronic illness, is hard enough without the added weight of judgement.

      The first time I let my judgement drop, and turned inward to my pain, I couldn’t breathe. Turning to look the demon in the eye bowled me over. “My stars, I carry such pain. I am in so much pain! I am!”

      This is hard space to hold for ourselves, but I truly believe we can do it, practice it over and over. Stop hating ourselves. Start loving ourselves. And heal, even if still in pain.

      Love you. Here for you.

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