A Needs-Aware and Boundaries-Intact Holiday Season
I endured significant stress in November, on top of all the usual things, like living with C-PTSD and chronic pain, and cooking everything from scratch due to our family’s food allergies.
December rolled up and I sat down. It’s taken great effort to hang lights and decorate a tree.
I took inventory of cards and stamps yesterday, then put them away. I shed some tears. I just can’t do it right now. People will get cards in the new year. Maybe.
For now, I’m shifting attention toward what HAS to be done, and away from things I feel pressured to do, by society, or by my own expectations. I’m even setting aside most of the things I WANT to do, like hosting holiday parties. If I’m going to get through the remainder of 2015 in somewhat healthy condition, I need to focus on the HAVE-TOs, and little else.
I feel disappointed setting this boundary, yet proud to be aware of my spoons. For years I pushed myself into exhaustion and sickness, unaware of my needs and limits. These days I am weighing choices and learning to say no, especially to myself.
This Sunday morning I’m listening to A Motown Christmas and drinking a mocha. I’m wishing you a needs-aware and boundaries-intact holiday season. <3